#𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 » filled under ; frank hamilton

[whileurmine]

@littledots did not ask for it but alas

he'd timed it because of course he had. frank might not have been the harvard alumini in the relationship, but he was a damn good detective. he knew his ex wife, and she worked on a schedule, — the moment he thought about it he figured there was probably some specific timing when it came to visiting tyler, and then all he had to do was pay attention to ethan's rambling about his coming and goings to catch on on what it was exactly. — so, of course, he timed it, he timed his way into to parking on the entrance of the golden ranch about five hours after ellie had last left. late enough that she would have been gone by now even if she had decided to stay a little longer, early enough that she wouldn't have come back yet, not for another two days. frank sat there in the driver's seat of the truck that advertised to everyone just who was driving, without him ever needing to leave his spot and thought about going back home. — his life was fine. he had a girlfriend, she was pregnant, he was happy. happy-ish. aas close to happy as he was capable of being. there was no goddamn reason in hell as to why he really needed to confront tyler about getting back with ellie. and yet there he was, gripping onto the steering wheel, gritting his teeth. knuckles white and jaw hurting. — maybe suvi was right all along, maybe he did need therapy, maybe admitting to a fucking stranger how much of a coward he truly was was better than whatever aimless bat swinging of his terrible feelings he was currently doing. he loved ellie, he loved tyler, he hated them both so much he couldn't think straight. he wished suvi's could make him forget he had a past, that there was ever any before her. he wished she was all there ever was. all there would ever. — frank took one deep breathe, allowed himself a second when he realized it came shaky. shifted his weight back and forth and then back again. and he was out of the truck, slamming its door, stalking his way to tyler, all anger and bravado, "you know, you are—" god, seeing his face made everything so much fucking harder. "you can be one motherfuckin' little shit sometimes, you know that, tyler?"

[halfmyfault]

he had been home for one day. one day. and he felt better already. it was that simple, that easy. home. he couldn't tell if it was the distance from his job, the proximity to his mom, the ever present soothing nature of suvi, the fucking peace— god, he could finally hear himself think. — and the most ridiculous part about it was that he couldn't stop thinking about tyler. poor fucking tyler. he had fucked tyler up and for what? drove all the way there and what was he expecting tyler to say? sorry i didn't give you a heads up. there is no way that would have satisfied him. frnak sighed loudly pulled his phone out of his pocket.

frank » tyler: so you know how in aa when you are getting sober and you have to try and fix all the shit you did when you were drunk? frank » tyler: is there such a thing as getting emotionally sober? frank » tyler: i'm at my mom's frank » tyler: any chance i can drive there to talk to you without getting shot? frank » tyler: no yelling this time, i swear on stephen hamilton's memory

[whileurmine]

"yeah." he is like an old car, pulling at the keys, forcing himself into functioning. "ye, yeah." the motor stutters before finally igniting. frank blinks and it's like he is awake for the first time all day. and all it really took was the promise of being around loki on his own, for just a little longer. "yeah." this second smile is easier, calmer, more at ease with himself, he finds the keys to his truck on top of his desk, and that's all the prompting frank needs. always looking for an excuse to leave his job aside. "come on." brushing his shoulder against loki's softly as he walked past the other man. he'd missed him. fuck, how he'd missed him. it almost felt a little stupid to be able to understand the feeling that easily. all the loneliness, misery, the terrible feeling sitting on top of his chest, it was all gone with the promise of a few private hours alongside loki. "how was your day? was it alright?" and then, "am i, am i allowed to ask that? was that weird?

loki wished he was capable of feeling less for frank, or at the very least disguising his feelings. however, neither of which he was particularly competent at. the other man had gotten under his skin, into his veins and his heart and his gut and he didn't feel right without him, as pathetic as he knew that was. he doesn't laugh over the man's joke, but a ghost of a smile does curl against his lips, trying his best to withhold from sharing his agreement too quickly, lest he look as desperate as he inwardly feels. "yeah, alright then." he swallows thickly, is well aware that he should turn and walk away but he can't. the offer of more time aline with frank was all too tempting, and he'd be damned if he didn't admit defeat when he knew it'd be an inevitability that he regretted it. "as long as you drive us, i'm...in."

[whileurmine]

@wcstelands liked this for a lyric starter

"i'm reeling in my brain again, before it can get back to you. —oh, what am i supposed to do without you?"

[halfmyfault]

@allcnfetti

he parked the car and then walked? no. skipped? ran, maybe? something between the last two. way too obviously excited to the point where it was almost embarrassing. ordinarily frank would have been embarrassed. in that moment, it would take a weather catastrophe to stop him in his tracks. a big one too. he was half certain he might just pull tyler into the barn while the tornado touched the ground outside. — so when he knocked on the door, all jittery energy and coy smiles, to find libby laura standing there. very little changed. — he simply tipped his hat. oh how he had missed his hat. and flashed her his best smile, "ma'am. hi, hey, afternoon, hm, you think you could point me to where tyler is? i— hm, clarifying point, i don't know how much he shares, we aren't fighting anymore, i'm not here to start trouble, i swear to god."

[whileurmine]

@nyctcphiliacs

he was fucked. he was thoroughly and profoundly fucked. either his wife would find out about the cheating, or he would end up way too invested in this little thing with meave. and it didn't matter which one, frank would be fucked. it's like you enjoy suffering, that's what he was arguing with himself about as he walked around town, this is gonna end badly, just stay away from her, just stay away from her and—and still, the moment he saw her, frank walked right up in her direction, wearing his best most clueless smile, "mrs. burke? how you doing this fine afternoon?"

[whileurmine]

jesus, jesus, jesus— he kept trying to have other thoughts and then the word jesus interrupted it like it was playing on loop in franks head. jesus. jesus christ or maybe jesus h christ, like tyler was always mumbling. the drugs must have hit frank because he felt a little lightheaded suddenly. suddenly very glad that tyler was far away and nowhere near touching distance. "heh, thanks." was the best he could do, which was nowhere near good at all. his voice too airy, his face too hot, tyler was drunk, right? he wasn't going to notice. "and you'd win that bet, tyler." frank chuckled. "i take care of spray painted walls and missing kitties, if i touch my gun it is out of habit, not necessity." and maybe that habit meant he was touching it a little more than three or four times a day, holding it just to feel its weight to make sure it was there, to remind himself if he could pull it if anything happened, if safety was suddenly yanked away. — if only frank could shoot at ghosts — "jesus fucking christ, man," frank laughed, breathlessly, all too impressed, that was one work of fucking art if nothing else, suddenly the interest in shooting was all sucked out of him, stuck staring at tyler instead. "what else you got?"

tyler grinned because normally frank would make a face, the devote catholic tyler could never be. libby laura gave up god in the seventies. something about leon being shipped off for war was a little too much for her. lost all her faith. she used to say there was a no god rule at the ranch. things were different now, but he still respected frank and libby laura for their beliefs, or lack there of in some cases. "oh, ok, gotcha, sorry. i didn't realize that there was a difference. i will say, that handsome does suit you much better. 'specially that smile of yours, frank." tyler hummed. "the fuck do you think i'm doing on the ranch frank? i'd bet money that i touch my gun at least three or four times more than you." tyler said, a little cocky. he watched frank fumble with getting his gun out, a cheeky smirk on his lips as he watched frank line up his shot. it was impressive, but when had tyler ever not been impressed by frank? "good shot." he nodded, crossing over, closer to frank. "what are you, thirteen?" tyler laughed, shaking his head. "frank, we're adults now, the tricks we can pull off now are far fucking cooler than making something jump. here." tyler took one more step closer to frank, turning to face him properly before he held the gun out, pointing it at the bottle. "watch this." tyler looked away from the bottle, looking towards the trees behind frank and himself. he counted backwards in his head, squeezing the trigger on one, looking back at the bottle just in time to see it jump off the log, falling back, bark and sawdust spraying around.

[halfmyfault]

@allcnfetti / frank and suvi.

"babe, babe, hm, i wanna. i gotta tell you something. i gotta tell you something. it's not, i didn't do anything, no one is in danger, i just— i gotta tell you something and i need you to be a little patient with me, because, because, i, i just have trouble, you know, getting the words out sometimes, you— you get it, right? and you, you can be mad, you know, you can, you can be mad at me or whatever else, but, i just, i gotta tell you, because not tellin' is just wrong and i just." frank sighed, running a hand through his face. "see, see why i am asking for a little patience?" there was a small, sad chuckle.

[whileurmine]

@ncrthernaura liked this for some angst.

"i need you to stop fucking calling me, okay?" he wiped the tear off the corner of his eyes. cleared his throat, "every time it's the same thing, you call me and we talk about our failed fucking relationship and at the end you are feeling better about yourself and i have to pretend i'm not about to have a breakdown. so i need you to stop fucking calling me, alright?"

[halfmyfault]

@allcnfetti cont. from here.

she called. she immediately called him, because of course she did. all he needed to do was text and his mom would call. if frank didn't know better he would think she was on her phone all day waiting for it. "hey, mom. hi. yeah, no, don't worry i'm okay, i— mom, i'm fine, nothing happened. i just miss home. no, i'm almost there already, like two minutes away. i'm taking my girlfriend to meet you. i, don't." he chuckled, "i don't think she minds that you didn't make a cake, mom. yeah, everyone likes cake, but." another small laugh, "do you want me to hide her away while you make the batter? i'm sorry i'm being silly? oh, wow, look at that. i can already see the house. listen, i'll help you make the secret cake later, alright? don't worry about it. suvi is the nicest person i've ever met. i promise you, she is not gonna hold the lack of cake over your head. just come here open the door for us, because i'm pretty sure i left my keys at home. okay, alright, alright, yes, okay, i love you too, okay, bye. see you in literally two seconds." frank chuckled. the car pulled forward. at the end of the dirt road was a two store farm house, surrounded by fruit tress and too many shrubs. green grass and colorful flowers spreading in all directions around it. and for the first time, the feeling was different enough that he didn't feel the overwhelming weight of nostalgia. it wasn't his truck, he wasn't driving. there was no reason to think this was anything like it had been years before. "she's gonna try drowning you in deserts, babe," frank smiled, softly, too soft, "if you don't want it just save it and i'll eat both our slices."

[whileurmine]

"i know! i keep asking him to just put it lower to help his own goddamn mother but it's like talking to a wall." frank could have complained all day but then then she was between his legs and nothing mattered anymore. the pea bag abandoned on the table nearby so he could wrap his arms around her waist. "eh." frank never did really get the hang of what to do when people called him a good person. he knew arguing against them wasn't the right answer. he didn't think he could take the compliment either. her soft kiss a good enough excuse for him to let it go, pulling her into his lap with a smile. "you do know i was a boy scout, right?" frank chuckled the memory so far away no it seemed like it came from a whole nother life. "i got all the way to first class scout til high school came along and i discovered a thing called beer and cigarettes. you ever heard of those?" laugh push past his lips, followed by a headshake. "i was also an altar boy. just too much time on my goddamn hands apparently."

she leaned up against the counter top and watched him open the container, taking a moment to admire the way his muscles tensed and flexed with the motion, his fingers holding tight as he twisted, not hiding her oggling even in the slightest. she tore her attention away and back up to his face as he handed it back to her, smiling wide at the look on his face. " mhm, i know i am, " she mused before turning back to get to what she'd been doing. as she refilled the container and checked dates on things in the cabinets and fridge, she listened to him explain. " yeah, mitch is kind of an idiot, " she agreed with a chuckle, folding the slowly emptying bags. jordan stuck them in the drawer where she usually kept shopping bags and came over to him, notching herself between his legs. " hm, so it's my fault you're a good person?? sure, i'll take credit for that, " she chuckled softly, holding his chin in her hands as if he was made of solid gold. " helping little old ladies... you're such a boy scout... and i mean that in a loving way, before you complain at me, " she mused, closing the space to kiss him sweetly.

[smckeslow-t]

@littledots​

the moment the door opened, he offered a smile, far too wide and goofy it to not seem like it had something behind it. “it’s the weekend!” frank announced, as if she didn’t know, as if there was any chance at all that he would be there knocking on her door that early in the morning if it was any other day of the week. “wait, first, hi, babe, good mornin’.” he leaned forward, holding her cheek as he pulled her closer into a quick kiss. smile warm, and then, back to excited. “it’s the weekend. and you ma’am, are you going away with me. so come on. let’s get somethings in a bag for you and yes, you gotta come. clothing is optional though.” frank chuckled. 

[whileurmine]

@wcstelands / bad break up au

"you are going on a date?" he didn't know why he was so offended, only that hearing about that information through the grapevine — also known as adrianna — was enough to have him there, arms crossed in their ( her ? ) living room as though he had just found out bella signed their daughter up to go another country without consulting him first. "a date. you are, you are going on a date?" frank had no right to be upset, he knew that. he had slept with half of his hometown. but that was— well, that was sex — and this, this was a date. "you know, if we had actually gotten married, that's, that's not even long enough for the divorce to be finalized. you are going on a date and we are not even divorced yet."

[halfmyfault]

.

[smckeslow-t]

tag dump.

[whileurmine]

open to: m/w/nb 21+

plot: hear me out, hear me out, you give me two of ur muses. and then we make them a group of friends who fucks sometimes and there is drama bc different crushes and argument and 'you slept with THEM?? i thought u wanted ME?/'. and like two are dating but muse a def has a crush on muse b and not their bf and idk. i just want chaos that starts off slow.

characters: frank hamilton. 42. firefighter. no working braincells. struggling with c-ptsd and substance abuse. wants someone to love him sososososososooso bad he will literally fall to the floor and beg. is sure no one ever will. && maximiliano "maxi." valladares. 42. ems pilot. can be convinced that the skies are green if you tell him about it with enough conviction. also has cptsd but he has decided it's not a problem and he is gonna care about other people instead of dealing with it. so touch starved he will cry if he gets a hug.

"if doctors don't want me to self medicate, then maybe they should give me some shit that actually fucking works." frank grumbled, downing the whiskey glass with the relief of someone who had spent far too many days without water. "i have bought xanax from high schoolers that made me feel better than the shit they have me on."

"have you considered—" maxi started, "and i know that's gonna sound crazy, but you should hear me out, have you considered— maybe giving it more than a single day? because i know for a fact it's been a single day." he poked at their friend sitting besides him on the bar booth. "help me. talk some sense into him."